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My Journey From Personal Unhappiness To Wholeness

Posted on August 18, 2015 by Jacki in Jacki's Blog 1 Comment

My life today is a long way from where I used to be.

I would like to introduce myself. My name is Jacki Janetzki and I’m a confident woman who finds it easy to assert my needs, speak up for myself, and openly pursue what I want. I believe in myself and am comfortable and at ease with me. I am blessed with a happy, loving family life – a husband I love dearly and two beautiful daughters that I cherish. I live my life with passion, doing the work I love and loving the work I do. Inspiration and creativity come easily to me and I spend my days absorbed in writing “words with impact” – short, powerful statements of self-belief that I share with people to help them shine. I truly believe that my fulfilling life is a reflection of the self-love that I have come to know within. Life hasn’t always been this way. My life today is a long way from where I used to be.

I was desperately unhappy and didn’t know why … I felt lost, and I didn’t know how I would ever find myself again.

1999 was a year when I found myself crying a lot. I was working at a job I didn’t enjoy and the tears were flowing everywhere – at work, family dinners, even hugging my yoga teacher after class! I was desperately unhappy and didn’t know why. In hindsight, my symptoms were probably those that the “experts” of today would label as depression. I didn’t seek any advice from a doctor, so I’ll never know. One thing I’m certain of is that I felt lost, and I didn’t know how I would ever find myself again.

I lived a withdrawn life of suppressed emotion for 30 years.

My heart is full of gratitude for the direct and caring way my Yoga teacher spoke to me the day that she looked lovingly into my teary eyes and said: “You need a Light-Heart Healing Session.” This simple, seven-word, statement changed and maybe even saved my life. I’m eternally grateful that I allowed myself to be guided by faith and trust at a time when I was lacking direction and in desperate need of help. I listened to my heart that day and scheduled an appointment to participate in a form of therapy that I’d never even heard of. To this day I am extremely happy that I did!

“My dam was full” and it felt like I had cried buckets of tears by the time we were done.

Looking back now, I often tell people that “my dam was full.” The floodgates sprang open during my first Light-Heart Healing session (a form of healing similar to Holotropic Breathing and Rebirthing), and it felt like I had cried buckets of tears by the time we were done. Never before had I cried so deeply, and when the experience was over I intuitively knew that this process was transformational and I wanted to do it again. I felt an amazing sense of lightness and liberation as a result of being encouraged and allowed to openly express myself. The freedom I felt after expressing emotion was light years away from anything I had ever experienced in the past. As a baby, I was given a pacifier to stifle my crying and whenever I hurt myself in childhood, my parents directed me to quickly contain my noise and tears.

The pain of the past has a major affect on the way we live our day to day lives.

A number of incidents during my childhood involved harsh words from various “authority figures” (teachers/parents/aunts etc.) which caused me deep emotional wounding and this resulted in me becoming a fearful little girl who lacked self-confidence. I always felt trapped by my painful shyness, and because I was unaware that tools for change existed, I continued to carry this uncomfortable, introverted identity with me into adulthood. After living a withdrawn life of suppressed emotion for 30 years, I had now found a simple, effective method that gave me the freedom to let go and express the stored anger and resentment associated with events from my past.

That’s when the “I’m okay” mentality emerges and we commence pretending that “It’s all good.”

I soon came to understand that the breath is the magic key that unlocks emotion from the subconscious mind. Human beings store remnants of traumatic life experiences in our subconscious minds and then trick ourselves into believing that they’re safely locked away in a place where they can no longer hurt us. We never, ever want to be faced with these painful memories again, so we go through life thinking that we’ve either dealt with or forgotten about our issues. This is when the “I’m okay” mentality emerges and we commence pretending that “It’s all good.”

I became passionate about freeing myself from the emotional pain of my past.

I wonder what would happen if we took the time to really consider the idea that our past experiences have a major affect on the way we live our day to day lives. It’s my personal belief that the pain of the past is what drives people to indulge in the disempowering behaviours of overeating, smoking, shouting at their children, hitting their spouses, drinking excessively, taking drugs, committing suicide etc. Once I developed a true understanding of the above concept, I became passionate about freeing myself from the emotional pain of my past, and eagerly participated in Light-Heart Healing Sessions every week for the next 12 months.

I cleaned out some of the “old” to make way for the “new” and became pregnant with my first child.

Little did I know that there was a tiny “being” in heaven watching my transformation and waiting for the right time to join me on Earth. By August 1999, I had cleaned out some of the “old” to make way for the “new” and I became pregnant with my first child. The more I began to offload my emotional burdens during pregnancy, the more space I created for inspiration to flow to me. I began receiving empowering messages of self-belief and commenced writing them down. After a short time, I felt the urge to share these words of wisdom with the world and from here, I launched a regular email service to share words of self-empowerment to help YOU shine.

Offloading my emotional burdens created space for inspiration to flow to me.

As I confronted and integrated incidents in my life that had been the catalyst for my introversion, I slowly began to feel more comfortable in my own skin. I had begun to grow wings and would soon soar.

A popular saying in life is: “Shit Happens” and yet I don’t ever remember signing a contact prior to my birth stating that I would be compelled to hold onto the residue of that emotional “shit” for the rest of my life.

Releasing the subconscious programming that no longer served me helped me develop new ways of thinking about myself, and this in turn paved the way for a happier life. I can honestly say that my creativity began after I commenced de-cluttering my subconscious mind. My talents were revealed when I released my emotional baggage. Previously I believed that “I’m too shy; I can’t do it; I don’t know how; I’m not creative etc.” These are all subconscious beliefs and I felt compelled to ask myself how they got programmed into my mind. The only true answer to that question is: “I put them there.” Phew! How liberating to come to the realization that if I had stored these disempowering beliefs in my mind, then I was the one in charge of removing them. The time had come for me to focus on new thoughts of personal empowerment.

I began to feel more comfortable in my own skin… I had begun to grow wings and would soon soar. 

I am so grateful I discovered the other “Secret” to obtaining everything you want from life: “Release your hurts and reveal your love.” Do the inner work to change you, and then you’ll see your life change.

 


Jacki is the founder of Loving The Law Of Attraction and has been published alongside world class leaders such as Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, Mark Victor Hansen, Jack Canfield, Brian Tracy, Arielle Ford and Sandy Forster in the Inspirational Book – The Path To Success.

Belief, Breathwork, Change My Life, Confidence, Creativity, Depressed, emotional healing, Emotional Pain, Faith, Fear, Freedom, Fulfillment, Gratitude, Happiness, Help, inspiration, Introverted, Liberation, light heart healing, Lightness, Lost, Love, Passion, Personal Empowerment, pregnancy, Rebirthing, Self Confidence, Self Love, shyness, Subconscious Beliefs, The Secret, transformation, Trust

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